“Good sex is like good bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.” – Mae West
Ha ha and true!
When a relationship gets too comfortable people react in ways that are definite turn offs when it comes to the bedroom.
While being secure and knowing your relationship is stable and safe is a nice feeling the manner in which you behave, and dress, and react may not be supportive of good sex. Comfy is all around us today. The way we appear, how we speak, the lack of politeness and manners, and so on.
When we let our bodily functions occur if front of our partner we can be viewed differently. How appealing are the sight and sounds that should only occur in a bathroom? Being slovenly and not smelling sweetly is not a come-on.
Knowing all the moves that will take place in the sexual repertoire is not exciting. Getting it over with and not continuing to connect doesn’t help matters.
So, in the end what I am advocating is not comfy sex in many regards.
Young people today are actually starting their sex lives later and they are having less sex than previous generations. That’s the facts!
Polyamory is common. Look it up.
Anal sex is also more practiced than ever before.
The percentage of high school students having sex has dropped from 54 to 40 percent.
Many GenX’ers report having no sex for periods of time.
About 60 percent of people under 35 live without a partner; one in three live with their parents!
Reasons for all of this may include the hook-up culture, economic conditions, anxiety, depression, use of opioids, technology use, and other issues.
Interestingly the use of digital porn, dating sites, dropping of testosterone levels due to the environment, careers, and sleep deprivation are all possible contributors.
While there are hundreds of reasons for having sex, there now seem to be many for not having sex.
Today many younger people prefer not having to be really involved with another person over time, and they can live with alternative forms of sexual behavior; i.e. the vibrator and masturbation as examples.
There are web sites for everything; to help you do IT, and to help you NOT do IT!
Some research shows that erectile dysfunction and porn have often made females more desirous of sex than males.
Pornhub the most watched porn site had lesbian sex as the most watched site, by men and women. The second highest watched was animated porn. People described it as a diversion and a way of relieving tension.
Some of all of this may be the reason the teen birth rate is down and that’s a good thing.
Only about half of college age students have hooked up or had a meaningful relationship. Most said they hoped for a long- term connection.
Many said their parents push for education and their extra-curricular activities took up a lot of their time and energy. Anxiety about a job also factored in here. Lots of pressure!
Love is not high on the list and many lack social skills. Flirting, dating, being romantic and knowing what love is all about is not easily come by.
All the apps for example, like, Tinder, Bumble, Match, OK Cupid, and Coffee Meets Bagel, take time and messaging is a lot of work. Most do not lead to dates. The photogenic also have an advantage here.
Sexual minorities prefer apps over meeting in public.
Meeting at a public place does not happen much anymore. People are not ready, and women are extremely cautious with the #MeToo movement scaring them.
The outcome of all this is that the sex toy industry is booming, and people are not having sex or bad sex if they don’t want to. One area of interest is that anal sex has risen in popularity. Even though many females report pain or not liking it.
Good sex occurs over time with information and communication; especially with someone you love who loves you.
Millennials prefer privacy and talk about how they feel about their genitals.
Desire and arousal and all the helping products today can make sex really fabulous.
Good sex makes you happy!!
We need education in this vital area and certainly before having babies.
So be comfy, but comfy with love and passion that you tend to like a beautiful flower.
” …sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love.” – Gabriel Garcia Marquez