“Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this…. that you are dreadfully like other people.” – James Russell Lowell
Okay, so is that a good thing or a bad or discouraging thing? You decide.
In a sense, it is a human condition that unites all people. However, and this is a big however, we all search for a way to be unique and appreciated for that uniqueness.
This happens as adults when most of us have outgrown the need to be accepted and like our adolescent peers. There are many who do want to stand out and do just about anything to be different during those adolescent years. Here it takes some funny forms.
Most teens want to look like and do what their peers do. They need that camaraderie and sense of belonging. The ones who are not in that group find another group that is ‘weird’ in its’ own way. They dress a certain way; like all in black. They wear their hair in unusual fashions, and they drink or take drugs along with their particular set of friends. Then there are the ones that get pierced in every possible body part. And, there are the tattoo people. Have you seen them? Are you one of them?
Recently, I have seen many with so many tattoos that you cannot tell if they are wearing clothes or if the entire arm or leg are full of tattoos. Have you even been waited on in a restaurant with one of them that took your appetite away?
Some of these tattoos cost a fortune and some are done by well known ‘artists.’
In any event, it is a way of being different and unique and yes, noticed!
What happens when they reach sixty years old I wonder?
Now being noticed is a good thing.
Standing out in a crowd is not bad. Being ‘special’ is a good feeling. We are all individuals to be sure. Some people need to be VERY special.
It then depends on your talents and qualities that make people remember you, want to be near you, be your friend, or emulate you. Even for posterity it becomes an issue.
Today being ‘politically correct’ is a big concern for many people. Even legally we have to address this.
But aside from that how do we get noticed?
When it comes to romance and finding or attracting a partner we use different approaches.
We can look the way we think we should to attract such and such a type person. We can use our intellect, and personality to attract attention. We can extend ourselves and become chameleons to be what we think a particular type of person wants. But if we are not GENUINE it won’t last, and we will be found out. What we truly are cannot be denied and not for long, at least.
So, the trick is to know yourself and what you have to offer and develop that part of you that makes you truly unique and special.
Yes, we are all special in our own way and hopefully to at least someone else or a lot of someone ‘elses.’
It does begin from birth and being wanted and really special to parents. If that didn’t happen it can be dealt with and other people can fill the void, but it is harder.
We can learn from rejection and failure how to be resilient. We can matter. We can become stronger and more insightful which will give us strength to have control over our lives in the long run.
If we try TOO hard, we can lose our true selves and that will not serve us well in the end.
Many times, people feel inferior because of the values and standards we have in the case of physical appearance for example. Remember Jimmy Durante? Most people with his large nose would hide in a closet. But he did the opposite and was not just noticed but loved as a result of his personality and talent which he developed. It is up to the individual.
While we do not live in a vacuum we can isolate ourselves enough to take stock of who we are and what we deliver to others and the world. It is up to YOU!!
Want to be affectionately noticed? Do something nice for someone!
“Be yourself is the worst advice you can give to some people.” – Tom Masson
What makes you unique? Are you noticed by the people you want to notice you? What can you do differently in this respect?