“Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.” – Anne Morrow Lindbergh
That word ‘communication’ is bantered around a lot. What does it really mean… or do?
We are sending out messages all the time; yes, verbal and non-verbal.
What we say is important and has meaning BUT what we DO is the real test.
Now our mouths are used for this ‘talk’ and for so much more.
We have our first feeling of need gratification when we are nursed by a mother or given a bottle. The mouth is used to eat. That is also an area where we feel pleasant sensations.
Think of the memories of wonderful meals at home or out with people you care about. The thought of a favorite dish from childhood evokes feelings that are warm and sweet.
Think of all those foods that are supposed to be aphrodisiac. It starts in the mouth.
Oysters, that trigger the production of sex hormones, chili peppers that release endorphins in the brain that mimic how you feel when aroused. Avocado to maintain vigor, chocolate to spike dopamine and feel pleasurable,
Banana, (and don’t forget the shape!), triggers testosterone production, honey regulates estrogen and testosterone.
There are other foods that are in this list. Coffee gets women in the mood for sex, and watermelon acts like Viagra and so on.
You get the picture; the mouth is the core of much in our lives. Just sounds make us respond in a variety of ways. Memories of sounds are there as well.
It is also used for sexual pleasure. Kissing, licking and biting are all included.
There are sexually transmitted diseases that can be gotten through the mouth. Herpes, gonorrhea, and syphilis, and hepatitis are in this list. Oral sex needs to be concerned about here.
Even in some religions bread and wine take on a special significance.
The mouth in all its ramifications is a real source of both pleasure and concern.
Now, back to the words that come out.
Words have meanings and they are never erased once out.
There are differences in the ways men and women connect through language.
Men, for the most part, are practical and think in broad terms. They are rational, and often withdrawn. They deal directly and are goal oriented. They use ‘love’ to get sex.
Women, on the other hand, generally like to connect and share and nurture. They appreciate small gestures, and their moods go in waves. They often expect a response without having to ask. They want intimacy and use sex to get ‘love.’
They give a lot emotionally and want a relationship to be the core of their lives.
Men fear opening their hearts completely and women fear being abandoned.
They both have a difficult time, as a result, to say what the other wants to hear.
Often the automatic response may feel good but in the long run it may have been a bad message.
Now we can’t be thinking of every word all the time, nor should we. But over time we should know what to expect and what our partner might like to hear.
If the messages are not getting across well, or there is misinterpretation only communication will solve the problem. So, more talk!
Romance and sweet words are necessary for women.
Valentine’s day is just the day for your mouth to be open!!
“At a dinner party one should eat wisely but not too well, and talk well but not too wisely.” – W. Somerset Maugham
Now let’s talk. Go to (firstname.lastname@example.org) and tell me about your Valentine’s day.